you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
