I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
