Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
