Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Please don't give away my fajitas
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
