I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
