meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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