I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
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