can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
