whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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