Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
