you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
