i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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