oh god the rape fog is back!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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