Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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