IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Let's paint friendship bongs
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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