My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
