no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
