So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
