Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
