New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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