Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i think my tv is drunk
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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