I'm going to jail i love you
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
