Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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