I can tuck mytits in my pants
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize