Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
