dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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