It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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