Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
