I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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