he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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