I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
