Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
