Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
