His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
There r osticjed everywhere
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Houston, we have a blender
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Randomize
