You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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