Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize