Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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