youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
