i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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