i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize