Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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