Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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