It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize