Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
