The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
false alarm. still invincible.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize