I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
