I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
