I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
