we have officially mastered the walk of shame
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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