so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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