she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
