do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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